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Category Archives for Managing teams

Support, positive intent

Can we find the postive intent?

What do we mean by positive intent?  I was reminded this week of the importance of belonging, and feeling like people have your back.  I said a few weeks back that the principles of improv include making sure your colleagues look good.  It embraces looking after them, making sure they are ok. It was a perfect chance to see this in action, because we did our first live performance this week, a showcase in front of family and friends.  Not a work situation, but I can see the parallels.

L'esprit de l'escalier

At times, I was a bit like a rabbit in the headlights.  I’m a little slow to catch onto ideas, so often I didn’t know how to react.  That French phrase, l’esprit de l’escalier, oh my goodness, how many of those have I had? When you think of the funny response on the way out.  But actually, there were also some that I had there and then, but wasn’t quick enough to jump in, and someone moved the action on. I found myself frustrated that I’d got a potentially funny story line, but lost the chance to use it.

Audience members amongst my friends said that a couple of the performers dominated.  There are some big personalities involved.  I also heard that one of the performers was upset about this, though I was not witness to the discussion they had.

I just wanted to share some of my feelings about the experience, and to examine my responses a bit more closely.

Belonging

There have been moments where I didn’t quite feel like I belonged.  I’m older than everyone else, and that doesn’t usually bother me.  Some friendships have been forged, meeting up at the weekend, sharing stories of dating and how that’s going. I’ve been married for donkey’s years and I’m a grandma, so obviously that social life is not for me. Some in jokes have developed amongst the lads, and I didn’t always feel included with those.

On the other hand, there were others who I really bonded with, and the tutor was always supportive and encouraging to those of us who were less confident in our ability to perform. I really liked a couple of the guys (I liked them all to be honest, even with the factors I just mentioned) and found them to be supportive too – I definitely felt that a couple of them went out of their way to help me.  There was only one other woman on the course, aside from the tutor, so we three were outnumbered by seven men.  Again, that wasn’t an issue, but I felt that the other woman also made an effort to include me, even though we are quite different personalities and she is much younger.

But then the actual performance brought up some issues.  Like I said, I was a rabbit in the headlights for much of the time. My dominant feeling afterwards was to be annoyed at myself for missing opportunities.  And then I felt bad too, because that meant I didn’t pick up on something someone else had said, even after he had taken a risk to say it. So in addition, I feel I let him down. I’m trying to be kind to myself and accept that this was the first time I’d done this live in front of an audience, but I’m still annoyed at myself.

Then others commented on the team dynamics, about people who dominated.  At first, I agreed with their perception, that a couple of people had kind of taken over.  There were times when someone rushed in, and I didn’t have the chance to take the direction I wanted to. 

I could have been annoyed about this, resenting how they took over.  But, using my developing empathy skills, let’s think about it from their point of view.  They may have been worried that the performance would go wrong, the story would get stuck.  They may have been worried that I would be stood on stage, in front of a live audience, and not know what to say, would freeze on stage.  I’d certainly frozen enough times in the weeks leading up to the show.

Positive intent

So instead of resenting them for not letting me go ahead, if I view their actions as having a positive intent, they were working to save me (and possibly one or two of the other participants) from the embarrassment of ‘dying’ on stage. Maybe they were doing what they thought was right to look after me.

I haven’t had the chance to debrief the show with them, so I have no idea what the other participants thought. I would really love to have the opportunity to talk to the guy who was upset about how it had gone.  I hope I’d be able to help him see that it wasn’t done deliberately to thwart him, but that the other person had their own concerns and was trying to help in the best way they knew how.

But if we continue with a work analogy, if someone behaves in a way that annoys you, can you reframe it, and think what their positive intent may have been?  Maybe they have anxieties of their own causing them to act in that way?  We’re going our separate ways now, but if it’s an ongoing working relationship, it’s worth the effort to look for the positive intent.  The choice is yours.  If you assume they’re out to get you, you’re building up negative feelings.  This obviously has a negative impact on you, but research consistently shows that negativity breeds negativity.  No-one likes sharing office space with a complainer.  If you assume they were trying to help you, you’ll be positively disposed towards them.  In return, they’ll like being around you, and continue to support you.

Team relationships

I get that I’ve not really made a central point here, probably because my own feelings are so entangled and it’s recent events, so I’m still trying to work it out.  We were effectively like a new team, so the relationships are also at the early stages.  It’s natural that we would get along more easily with some than others, and unavoidable I guess that there would be more than one grouping amongst us.

Annie McKee, in ‘How to be happy at work’ talks about how important friendships are at work, and how organisations can foster a spirit of openness and trust that allows friendships to develop.  The improv course did everything it could to facilitate this.  How does your workplace do?

You can see my review of ‘How to be happy at work’ here.

People standing on pavement

What can improv teach us about work?

In her book ‘How to have a great day at work’ Caroline Webb suggests that a technique of improvisational comedy is a good way to give brain friendly feedback.  ‘Yes, and….’ instead of ‘Yes, but…’ fosters collaboration and helps bring out the best in others.

Ever since I read this, I’ve been intrigued to learn more about improv.  Facebook must have known this, because they kept telling me about a local course, starting soon.  I signed up.

I mean, I love my books but some things you can’t learn from a book, you’ve got to get out in the real world, meet real new people and do new things.  I thought this would be fun.  A little bit out of my comfort zone – I once did a short stand up comedy course, ending with a showcase performance.  That was a bit scary, but I rehearsed and knew my routine.  Improv – well, that’s a whole different ball game, but I thought it would be fun, so what the hell?

It is not what I expected.  I don’t know what I expected, but this wasn’t it.  On our second meeting, we were asked to stare into someone’s eyes for two minutes and imagine their life.  I knew next to nothing about these people.  One guy (they are mostly guys, only one other woman, although the trainer is a young woman) the only thing I know about him is that he’d just been accepted onto a wimp to warrior MMA training programme.   I don’t know what that is, but it sounds serious.  Another guy, the only thing I knew about him is that he’s autistic and didn’t like the light in the room we were in.  And the third guy, I know his name, but that’s about it.  But then I eased into it a bit and started making stuff up.  Which I think is what we were meant to do.

We also created a soundscape.  For those of you who don’t know what that is – and again, I didn’t – it involves sitting in an outward facing circle, in the dark, with our eyes closed, making noises.  Mostly copying other people’s noises, but occasionally dropping in a new one.  Now, ask me to stand up in front of an audience to speak and I’m good to go.  But you want me to sit in the dark, with my eyes closed, amongst strangers, and make funny noises? Seriously? Do I have to?

We also learned the ‘Yes, and…’ technique.  Whatever someone said, you had to accept it and build on it.  I got involved in drug smuggling in Colombia and found I had an alcohol problem on holiday in the Caribbean.  I think there were drugs there too.  (We’re new, not sure we had the right idea.)

You might be wondering why I’m telling you all this.  Well, even though I’d started out with the knowledge that improv could foster collaboration at work and bring out the best in others I was nevertheless surprised at the life lessons in the first two classes. Here’s a few of the things I learned.

It’s always your turn

You don’t leave it to someone else, be proactive, participate and remember it’s always your turn.  How useful is this at work? Ever work in one of those places (public sector is good at this) where people take the attitude ‘I’m not doing that, it’s not my job’? How much better would it be if everyone had everyone’s back, and just jumped in and did what’s necessary?

Make the other person look good

They may come out with something completely random or out of character – I mean, do you think I’d actually get involved in drug smuggling?  But it’s been said, so work with it, and make the other person look good.

Imagine if everyone at your workplace used this principle, that they always had to make everyone else look good?  There wouldn’t be problems of people taking credit for others’ ideas, because everyone would be focusing on making their managers, their team members and their colleagues look good. The level of collaboration would sky rocket, and so would productivity.

Let it go

I discovered I have a problem letting things go.  I’ve never considered myself a control freak.  I’m usually the one suggesting other people let it go.  Driving for example, and some idiot cuts in front, others get all worked up, honking and swearing at the other driver.  I’m the one saying you’re only winding yourself up, let it go.

But when we start to take turns adding bits to a story, I was really frustrated if someone didn’t say what I thought they should.  I did not like giving up the control to others or letting go of the outcome.

Autonomy at work is a key driver of motivation, so if you’re a manager finding it difficult to give up control, you’re stifling your team. Like me, you’re going to have to learn to let it go.

Empathy

I found the exercises helped to develop empathy.  Even though I was making it up, I felt empathy for the people whose eyes I sat staring into.  And it also made me want to know more about them. It was good to develop some curiosity about someone else, especially if you’re the kind of person who doesn’t naturally consider things from someone else’s perspective.  Putting yourself in someone else’s shoes at work would get rid of much conflict.

It was a difficult exercise to do, I totally get that this is a bit full on for work, and not everyone would be comfortable throwing themselves into this.   But (ah damn, I said ‘but’!) if you can at least stop and consider someone else’s position before reacting, then working relationships will be smoother.

Listening skills

Are you a good listener?  An active listener? Too often, we’re not fully listening to what someone else is saying, we’re waiting for our turn to speak.

Feeling heard is a powerful motivator.  Disempowered people often feel that their concerns aren’t being heard, and at work this can lead to resentment, which in turn leads to low motivation, and then low productivity.  Even just on a practical level, if you’re not listening to problems that others at work are experiencing, you’re also shutting off possible solutions

Dance group teamwork

I’m not suggesting all workplaces introduce courses in improvisational comedy – though that could be fun – but it doesn’t hurt to borrow techniques that can improve your day at work.

What do you think?  Is there a particular behaviour you could improve to make things better at work?

Walking

How to make friends at work

When Gallup created their poll into engagement at work, they added a question about whether you had a friend at work. Critics said it wasn't a useful question, but Gallup stood firm. Their poll consistently shows that having a friend at work is a good indicator of engaged employees.

In The Best Place to Work, Ron Friedman said the keys to lasting workplace relationships are proximity, familiarity, similarity and self disclosure.  And our old friend reciprocity pops up again.  Friedman quotes from the research

​The Best Place to Work

​Ron Friedman

If you want two people to connect … factual exchanges aren’t enough.  What you need is for people to reveal intimate information about themselves in a reciprocal fashion.  Having one person talk and the other listen won’t get the job done, it will leave one person feeling exposed. …both partners need to self disclose.  ​


​Friedman also states that the more frequently colleagues talked about non work matters, the closer they tended to be.

But obviously trying to force this doesn’t work.  Self disclosure has to be done naturally and over time.  Setting up ‘team building’ days where everyone is expected to share experiences can alienate some people.  I well remember being forced to stand in a circle for group singing, which I hated.  I also remember the mother of my daughter’s friend blurting out to my mother in law she’d just come back from the marriage guidance counseller – within minutes of meeting my mom in law! I mean, I hardly knew the woman, it was oversharing to tell me. 

That’s why shared activities can be useful.  The after work drinks might be one way to do this, but isn’t always practical for everyone, if they have domestic or other commitments to get to.  So what about a shared lunch? Or a walk during the lunch break.  A friend told me that at one place she used to work, someone would get a quiz book, and they’d spend 15 minutes or so answering quiz questions. It wasn’t a pre planned thing, someone would just bring the book out.  But you could have an inter team quiz scheduled.  Make a small charge for charity and you’re helping someone out, so a double win.  Don’t make it an inter team event, but say that all teams must have a mix of members from other departments, and you’re spreading the love even further. Another example I heard of is a group yoga session after work.  If you have a suitable space, you could all chip in and pay for a group teacher.

If you’re the manager and you can find a small budget for one or more of these activities, it’s a great way to foster team spirit and wellbeing for not much outlay.

Even if you’re not the manager, and there’s no budget, you can initiate something.  Make it something you like to do, and you’ll be more motivated to organise it on a regular basis.  Don’t force it – if it’s something you enjoy, hopefully there will be others who enjoy the same activity.  If one doesn’t work, try something else.  Take ideas from other places you’ve worked, what worked there?  Join in if someone else organises something – the support you offer will also help you to develop the relationship.

 Leave a comment below – what’s worked for you to help you create friendships at work?


What do you do if your manager doesn’t know how to manage?

I’m going to hazard a guess that you’ve seen ​managers who don't know how to manager, can’t motivate their staff. Maybe even worked for one. Hopefully haven’t been one, but sometimes, you know, that happens too - we can all learn to be better. Often, this is because of poor workplace culture – not always, there are cases of one off ineffective managers in good organisations, but in the main, the poor managers are a result of poor organisations in my opinion.

What if you’re unfortunate enough to find yourself working in one of the places with some of these managers? How do you deal with that? Can you change the culture by yourself, or does the culture come from the top? As a comment in a previous post asked, ‘Is this really the responsibility of the individual if they are a lone voice? … Is it the responsibility of the management, organisation or team to change the culture?’

As I’ve argued before, if you are a lone voice with no power or authority within a toxic work environment, then no, realistically, you’re not going to make a significant difference. Does this mean you shouldn’t try? If you’re stuck with the job, even for the time being, surely you want to make some effort to improve things?

I recently re-read Stephen Covey, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, and one concept that was a bit of lightbulb moment for me was reading about circle of concern vs circle of influence. I realised I’d been getting all bent out of shape over things I couldn’t impact. Brexit, Donald Trump, austerity…my circles of concern. When it would be much more beneficial and impactful if I focussed on my circles of influence – where I could make a difference.

Let’s apply this to the toxic workplace. Can you change government policy and get them to make the right investment in your public sector service, so that it can properly serve the people it claims to serve? No. (Ok, my politics might be showing a bit here)

Can you change the strategic plan your managers and leaders are working towards? Mmm, maybe, a little, but unlikely. Depends what stage it’s at.

Can you change the targets your manager wants you to work towards? Again, maybe. Put together a good argument for why the targets are unrealistic, and a proposal for revised targets. If your manager has a little wiggle room, then you may be able to get them agreed. If the culture is very poor, maybe even that wouldn’t be successful. But give it a go – you won’t know unless you try.

Can you change your manager’s behaviour towards you? Not directly, you can’t make them change.

Can you change your behaviour towards your manager? Ah, there we have it. You can change your behaviour. You can change your response to your manager’s behaviour, and that in itself might result in a change of your manager’s behaviour.

Ditto your colleagues. You can’t make them change, but you can change your behaviour towards them, and their behaviour back might just change too.

Again, none of this is simple. If it was just as simple as deciding to change, and then doing it, we all would. But we’re creatures of habit, and changing habits is really hard. I mean, really, really hard. So let’s start with some simple things, and here’s an idea you can try out.

Give a cheerful greeting. Say a cheery good morning to everyone you meet as you arrive at work. If no-one does this at your workplace, people will be surprised at first. But persist. They’ll start to reply, and slowly it will alter the atmosphere slightly. When someone asks how are you (or that Brummie greeting of ‘alright?’, where you’re just meant to say ‘alright’ back) answer ‘Fantastic thanks!’ This is really fun to do, especially if your customary answer is ‘not too bad thanks’. People will want to know why you’re feeling fantastic, you’ll develop new connections with people you’ve not really spoken to before, and it will alter your own mood – it’s tricky to feel miserable or say ‘Fantastic!’ in a glum voice. Starting in these small ways will develop into a changed way you greet people generally, and you will make a difference.

The more you change your behaviour and responses to others, the more you will find your circle of influence grows.

Try this for a week, and let me know in the comments section how you get on. What difference has it made?

Want more tips like these?  Download 7 things you can do to make work better today​

Man working late

Stressed at work? #WorldMentalHealthDay

World Mental Health day today then.  It’s trending on Twitter under three different hashtags, several more on Instagram, Linked In has articles on it, people are posting memes on Facebook.  I’ve also had emails on it, telling me what organisations are doing to raise awareness of mental health issues.

This is all very well, and I’m not saying it won’t help for people to be more aware and more sensitive to the issues surrounding mental illness.

But what really winds me up is organisations talking about what they’re doing to ‘raise awareness’, and what they’re not talking about is stress at work.  How much is the workplace the cause of the mental health issues their people are experiencing? Are they working in poor conditions? Too much work leading to long hours? A culture that frowns upon anyone who leaves on time or doesn’t get in extra early? Having to take work home? A micromanager? A bully for a manager?  Or management by absence?

I listened to the Birmingham Chamber of Commerce podcast today, with interviewees from two large organisations in Birmingham talking about what they’re doing about mental health.  Apart from a mention that work addiction is an addiction too, there was nothing about the role the workplace plays in causing mental health issues.  There was a lot of talk about raising awareness.

Now these two businesses might be great places to work, but equally, they may be creating stress for their employees.  If they’re not talking about it, chances are, nothing is being done about it.  If their people have any of the issues I mentioned causing them stress at work, what are these organisations doing to address that problem? Are there genuine solutions available to them, and are they encouraged to take them up?

Birmingham Chamber also says that poor mental health and wellbeing is costing the West Midlands region more than £12 billion a year. The CIPD’s annual survey into health and wellbeing at work shows that stress is one of the top three causes of long term absences across all sectors, and the top cause of long term absence in the public and non-profit sectors. So it really doesn’t pay to ignore this issue.

One exception I did find on Twitter is Prof Sir Cary Cooper, speaking at the Mad World conference. He says that employers need to identify what could be damaging workers’ wellbeing, instead of looking for quick fixes like mindfulness at lunch.  Prof Cooper is a professor of organisational psychology and health at MBS Manchester University, so has some authority to make these observations.  Although it’s so obvious that if people are overworked for long periods of time, they’ll get stressed, and that will eventually result in sickness absence, I don’t understand why more employers don’t see this.

If you’re overworked and it’s having an effect on your mental health, I recommend you read How to do a great job and go home on time by Fergus O’Connell.  It has some great strategies to deal with this problem.  This book review tells you a little more about it.

You can also join my 30 day challenge to change how you feel about work.

[WPMKTENGINECTA id=”20c659a041b84a93bf” align=”center” hastime=”false”]

​O’Connell, Fergus 2005 ​How to do a great job and go home on time ​Pearson Education Limited, Harlow​​​

Trust and productivity – are they related?

Some studies have been reported in the HR press this week, I share my thoughts about a couple of statistics.

 

 

Links here to the reports mentioned

CIPD Labour market outlook Aug 2018

Senior management are the least trusted in the workplace

 

 

 

achievement-adult-agreement-1376864

How to develop and grow trust

​Last week's post told Jeanette's story, and showed how untrustworthy managers can cause problems.  

​What can be done in this situation?

Firstly, it does fall to this manager to be willing to look at his behaviour and determine to develop his skills and alter his approach. Or it falls to his managers to encourage him, or get rid of him.  But let’s suppose he is willing to change.  How can he develop the trust of his team?

Stephen Covey, in The Speed of Trust, says that it can be done, even though it is tougher to regain trust once lost.

There are four elements – two relate to character, two relate to competence, and all four rely on each other.

The four elements are

​Character

  • Integrity
  • Intent

​Competence

  • Capability
  • ​Results

Let’s look at what each of these mean.

​Integrity

Doing the right thing – even if no-one is watching. Integrity is more than honesty, it’s also congruence, humility and courage.  After Gandhi spoke for two hours without notes to the House of Commons, his secretary said ‘What Gandhi thinks, what he says, what he feels, are all the same.’  And it’s important to have the courage to do the right thing, even when it’s difficult.

​Intent

We all make mistakes.  But what’s important is our intent. If we believe that someone’s intent is to help, do good, then we will feel we can trust them.  But if we don’t trust their intent, how can we trust them?  Using the example above, if we think the manager’s intent in yelling at his junior staff member was to help them learn (alright, that’s a stretch, but if he was normally helpful, and this was out of character, then we might accept that the telling off was meant to help her not to do it again) and we would still have trust for the manager. But if we know the other stuff about him, we’ll believe the roasting will be to protect his own ​behind, and that he has no interest in actually helping his team member to develop and grow. And the mistrust is what will develop and grow.

​Capability

Moving on to competence, we will not trust someone who we don’t think can do what we expect them to do. You might trust your GP for example.  But if she then says you need open heart surgery, and she will do it for you, you’re unlikely to trust such a specialised procedure to a general practitioner with no experience in surgery.

​Results

What results have been delivered?  Moving back to the manager (I should give him a name – maybe I’ll call him Ron – Ron Manager?) what results has he delivered?  The job of a manager is to get the best out of his people.  Probably to help retain expertise for his organisation, reduce stress and sickness absence. Ron is losing people left right and centre, there’s above average sickness absence, and those that stay don’t perform very well, motivation is at an all time low.

On the other hand, a manager who has a happy and productive team obviously has their trust, and equally important, trusts his team to carry out the organisation’s purpose without looking over their shoulder, and knows they will go above and beyond when it’s needed.

If you would like to improve trust within your organisation, I’d recommend reading ‘The Speed of Trust' by Stephen Covey with Rebecca Merrill, see below for more details.

​You can also give me a call to talk about how Silvern Training can help you achieve a positive, dynamic workplace using our seven guiding principles of Pam Cast.


​Call Lindsay on 0121 624 1957

​Covey, Stephen M R and Merrill, Rebecca R ​2006. ​The Speed of Trust. Free Press, a division of Simon & Schuster, Inc  ​New York

suspicious looking handshake

What happens when there is no trust?

The last – and most important - of our seven principles is trust. Although it is the most important, it is last for a reason.

You can’t have trust without the other six principles in place.  A friend of mine was often complaining about her manager, and one of the things she often said was ‘I just don’t trust him’.  So one day I asked her why.  She launched into a bit of a tirade, I was almost sorry I asked. 

​Jeanette's story


‘I knew that in whatever situation he wouldn’t put my interests first, always the organisation or himself. He wouldn’t have my back, even if I was following his instructions, it would be my head on the chopping block, and he wouldn’t even have blinked.


If demands were made for the team to work in a different way, he’d just agree to it without asking us if it caused any problems, even agreeing to things that went against our employment contract, things that jeopardised our safety, because his bosses wanted it.  He’d just buckle under pressure, and never look out for us.  When the problems were brought to his attention, he just became patronising, belittling the danger.  He would never admit he’d made a mistake.


A new, junior member of staff once did something that breached client confidentiality – it was accidental, it wasn’t malicious.  It was serious, and she needed to be called on it, but this manager bawled her out over it in front of everyone. He didn’t take the time to work out if she had missed out on training, he just tore off a strip, I’ll show my managers I’m coming down hard on you.


To meet our tough performance targets, we needed to work extra hours, and we’d often done this out of goodwill.  But if he hadn’t got our backs, why should I have his?  All goodwill went, our motivation was totally depleted. In another role, I often went over and above if the team needed it, I would do it because I knew they had my back.’

I asked my friend how she felt now about this experience.  She said that even now, more than a couple of years later, she felt angry about it, and it took a lot more experience before she realised it wasn’t her fault.  It still irritates her that she judges her work surroundings by it.  She isn’t fully happy in her current role, but is relieved it’s not as shit as that.

I’m sad for my friend that she had to go through that.  I’m sad that she uses that as a benchmark for how good her job is.  I’m also sad for the organisation and the people it’s meant to serve.

​Let’s dissect some of the things she said about her manager’s behaviour. 

He wouldn’t have my back​

​He’d just agree to it without asking us if it caused any problems

​He just became patronising, belittling the danger

He would never admit he’d made a mistake

​This manager bawled her out over it in front of everyone

​He didn’t take the time to work out if she had missed out on training

​Goodwill -  if he hadn’t got our backs, why should I have his?

In other words, he wouldn’t support members of his team

​Again, showing the lack of support.  Also taking away the team members’ autonomy

No appreciation for the team’s opinions, contribution, concerns.

Undermining any trust there might have been

Appalling communication skills

​​Bawling her out would have no impact on future learning and development.  Well, not in a good way.  

​People who don’t feel valued and appreciated won’t go the extra mile when it’s need.

​What effect did this lack of trust have?

​Motivation was totally depleted.  We lose sight of why we’re doing the job we’re doing if we don’t feel appreciated, supported, have no autonomy, suffering from poor communication amongst our team.  Being engaged with our purpose makes us more effective and productive, but this engagement cannot thrive under these conditions.

​The new member of staff publicly bawled out probably learned to keep her mouth shut, keep out of the way of the manager if possible.  Ruling through fear and intimidation is not a good way to develop your team’s skills in becoming effective. Did she need more training in the rules of client confidentiality?  Was this an error or omission on her part, or is it something that should be more effectively trained as part of the induction – are the current systems and processes as effective as they could be?

Another result is that my friend left – she looked for other employment, and found it.  So that organisation lost someone with many years of experience in the field, someone who was committed to helping this client group, someone talented and with a lot of commitment to working with this client group, a difficult group to work with. They were left with the alternative of advertising, recruiting and training someone else.  As I said last time, it c​an cost six to nine months salary, or £30,000 to replace a member of staff. Or not replacing her, so that they offered a lesser service, clients lost out, society lost out, the remaining staff were even more stretched and stressed.

And that’s just one team member.  Multiply that – how many others did they lose?  How much did they lose in sickness absence through stress?  How much did they lose having a demotivated team, who were not willing to go the extra mile if necessary, because the manager didn’t have their back?

We’ll look next time at what can be done to develop and increase trust.

Young man at laptop with two women helping

What are you doing to support your team?

​Why should you, as an employer, support your staff?  They are there to do something for you, and you pay them for their service, so you don’t owe them anything, right?

Well, maybe, but then what happens when you need them to go the extra mile?

I worked in charities for a long time.  I know that most of the people who work in charities do it because they love the sector, believe in making a difference for their cause, and usually are willing to work over and above their contracted hours because of this.  They also know how strapped for cash their charity is. The public’s perception is that the sector is full of highly paid executives happy to take their excessive salary at the expense of the people they are meant to be serving.  The truth is that most people are underpaid for the work they do, accept this because of their commitment to the cause, regularly attend events out of hours or work unpaid overtime.

I spoke recently to a teacher who works with teens in alternative education.  The naughty kids, she called them, though I could tell she didn’t buy into this description, she was just using that to explain herself to people who didn’t understand her role. She’s worked for this organisation for a few years, and has amazing results getting these teens through their GCSEs.  Someone asked her how she coped with misbehaviour and abuse.  While she downplayed it, she did say it was tiring dealing with these students.  Having done this myself a few years back on a part time basis, I can only imagine how exhausting it would be full time.  So I asked if her organisation looked after its staff. 

'Being honest', she said, 'No'. Most teachers only stay one or two academic years.  She is the longest serving member of staff, but the organisation won’t fund her to complete her teaching qualification. So, despite her years of experience in a difficult role, she is trapped.  She can’t leave like others have, because she wouldn’t be able to get a similar position. And can’t afford to self fund to gain her qualification. (Possibly because she’s not on a great salary, though she didn’t say this.)

It costs to operate like this

It’s costing the organisation to operate like this.  It would cost them around £2,500 to fund this teacher’s qualification.  One source suggests that it is costing them six to nine months salary to replace an employee. [1]   Another, an ACAS study in 2014, put the cost at £30,000 per person.[2] And that’s without factoring in the loss in productivity because the replacement teachers aren’t as skilled at working with this difficult group of students. Their results aren’t as good as they could be, and the impact on reputation will be costing them too.

When I talk about trust (see next post) the example there is of a manager who ‘doesn’t have my back’.  This person did leave that organisation.  They say people don’t leave the job or the organisation, they leave bad managers.  An article in Inc last year put the figure as high as 75% of people leaving because of bad management and leadership[3]It’s clear that lack of support is one of those factors. If people don’t believe their manager, and by extension their organisation, cares about them, then there is no loyalty.

On the other hand, a small manufacturing company gave one of their employees unlimited time off when his wife became seriously ill.  They even paid him for a significant portion of the time he took.  In return, he’ll have no hesitation in staying late, or more realistically, getting in early (his wife is now in a care home, he visits daily) if his company needs a rush job.  He’s unlikely to look for another job, because he wouldn’t know if a new employer will be so understanding about his commitment to his sick wife.

What really matters?

Kevin Murray, who commissioned a YouGov poll, found that the single most important cluster of attributes in getting good results were understanding and caring, which he broke down into these components

  • Makes me feel I contribute
  • Shows how work affects others
  • Gives good feedback
  • Cares about me
Hands making fist bump over desk

Is appreciation better than a pay rise?

​How much do we love to hear what a good job we’ve done?

Apparently, we love it more than we love a pay rise.  (Ok, that assumes we’ve already got enough to live on, and I know that unfortunately there are too many people who can’t say that. I don’t think that’s right, and we should do something about that. But that’s not the problem I’m working on today.)

A 2012 study at Berkeley university[1] found that while a pay rise briefly made us feel appreciated, a far better indication was the respect and admiration of our peers.  We do love a pay rise – let’s be honest, even if you’re not mainly motivated by money, a bit more is usually good.  However, the feel good factor soon wears off, and we get used to that extra income pretty quickly.  According to that study though, we never get used to feeling the respect and admiration of our peers.

What happens if we don’t get respect and admiration? A friend of mine used to work as a teaching assistant, working with children who had special needs, to help them integrate into mainstream education.   A worthwhile and rewarding job, you’d think.  And she did love the children, and enjoyed helping them with their schooling.  But the teachers in this particular school saw the job as low importance and she always felt that the head teacher didn’t value her contribution or that she was a useful member of the team.  Unsurprisingly, she eventually left.

Failure, burnout, stress, no motivation – these are all symptoms when you don’t feel appreciated at work.  They are common in jobs like call centre work, retail, low paid work.  And of course results in lots of stress and high turnover of staff.

So let me turn this around – if you’re a manager, how often do you show your appreciation for your team?  Do they feel respected and valued?  How many of your team have the respect and admiration of the rest of the team?

You might think you’re too busy to show appreciation.  But as a manager of staff, that’s a key element of your job.  And yes, I understand you need that too.  Which brings us to workplace culture.  If you have a culture of ‘too busy’, stressful, no time, don’t care about people, then you get what you deserve – people who are too busy to do a good job, people who are too stressed to give their best, people who will leave as soon as something that looks better comes along.

Call centres

​Even call centres can have a culture of looking after their staff. The Admiral Group is regularly named as one of the best places to work.  In his account of working part time at their Cardiff call centre, James Bloodworth says


‘…even dull jobs could be made bearable for the workforce without any real cost to employers.  Working in the retentions department of a car insurance firm was as dull as I had expected it to be.  Yet the company did make a serious effort to ensure that it was not the sort of workplace that, sat at home watching Coronation Street in the evening, you dreaded returning to the next day.  It was tolerable, and most of the staff I spoke to seemed if not to enjoy it then at least not to find it too oppressive, even if I thought they should be paid more.’​


Hired. Six months undercover in low-wage Britain, James Bloodworth (2018) Atlantic Books, London p1 185-6​​​


The more valued we feel, the better we work.  Those who regularly receive praise and thanks for a job well done are more likely to go the extra mile when it’s needed.

If you want to know how to change the culture in your workplace to one that fosters a culture of worth and appreciation, give me a call and we’ll talk about how Silvern Training can help.

Speak to Lindsay on 07976 816704

[1] Anderson, C et al ‘The Local-Ladder Effect: Social Status and Subjective Well-Being’, Psychological Science 23 (2012): 764-71.  Quoted in Friedman, R 2014 The Best Place to Work Penguin Group New York